BELERIAND HUMILIATED: LENS ALL-STARS TEACH A MASTERCLASS IN EFFICIENCY
What a pathetic display of football we witnessed today as Beleriand managed to turn a professional match into a chaotic amateur hour. While the boys from Lens All-Stars arrived with a tactical plan and a hunger for glory, Beleriand seemed to think they were participating in a clumsy wrestling tournament, racking up five fouls before they even managed to find their own shadow. The scoreline of 1-3 is actually flattering for the home side, who spent most of the afternoon chasing ghosts and kicking ankles rather than the ball. 🤡
The nightmare began early for Beleriand, as Lens All-Stars sliced through their nonexistent defense with surgical precision, netting two goals in the first eighteen minutes. It was a clinic in how to destroy a morale-deprived opponent. By the time the clock hit the 70th minute, Lens All-Stars had effectively put the game to bed with a third goal, proving that you don’t need to commit a dozen fouls to be effective—just one yellow card for Lens All-Stars compared to the total disarray of their opponents tells the whole story.
In a desperate, eleventh-hour attempt to save face, Beleriand finally managed a goal in the 90th minute, but let’s be honest: it was the football equivalent of a "Sorry for your loss" card sent three days late. With only one shot on target for the entire match, Beleriand looked less like a football club and more like a group of tourists who got lost on the way to the stadium. Congratulations to Lens All-Stars for the victory; as for Beleriand, perhaps it is time to trade the boots for some knitting needles. ⚽🔥
