Championship

Full time

Key moments

  1. 88'

    Yellow card for Bounty délicat

    The referee reaches for his pocket for this minor foul and it's the red... no, the referee made a mistake pulling that card, he apologizes, it's just a yellow!

  2. 86'

    Goal for AS Riotord! Suly

    Oh, what a blunder!!! Billy BRENNAN plays a weak backpass to his keeper, Suly intercepts, rounds the keeper, and scores into an empty net...

  3. 80'

    Yellow card for Gros Tocard

    Gros Tocard gets a yellow card; he needs to be careful now, the referee is watching him closely.

  4. 34'

    Yellow card for Thibault Joly

    Yellow card for Thibault Joly! You have to wonder how he escaped a red for that nasty challenge...

  5. 25'

    Goal for Poulpe! Ambidextre

    A powerful strike from Ambidextre that is unfortunately deflected by Pexo, beating his own keeper.

  6. 21'

    Goal for Poulpe! Thibault Joly

    After a long passing sequence, Petit Tocard lays it off for Thibault Joly, who beats the keeper with a powerful strike! Well played!

  7. 9'

    Penalty converted by Petit Tocard

    And GOOOAL! Perfectly executed penalty sending Qecu the wrong way.

  8. 9'

    Yellow card for Qecu

    Qecu is lucky to get away with just a yellow card.

  9. 1'

    Goal for AS Riotord! Juwi

    Juwi lobs Robin Risser who was off his line, and the ball ends up in the back of the net!

What a glorious display of "anti-football" we witnessed! Poulpe walked away with a 3-2 victory against AS Riotord, proving once and for all that you don't need to be accurate to be a winner. While AS Riotord spent the entire afternoon playing like they were auditioning for a ballet company—racking up six shots on target and playing with the grace of saints—Poulpe decided that the best way to defend a lead was to simply kick everyone in sight. With five fouls and three yellow cards, Poulpe turned the pitch into a wrestling ring, effectively strangling the game while barely bothering to aim at the goal. 🐙

The first half was a fever dream for Poulpe, who scored two goals before the opposition had even realized they were in a match. Meanwhile, AS Riotord suffered from a chronic case of "the post-hates-us" syndrome, wasting every free kick and opportunity that came their way. It wasn't until the 86th minute that AS Riotord finally found the net, but by then, the damage was already done. The sheer efficiency of Poulpe—scoring three goals from a measly three shots on target—is either a statistical miracle or a dark pact with the football gods.

As the final whistle blew, the contrast was hilarious: AS Riotord walked off with a single yellow card and a sense of moral superiority, while Poulpe limped away with three points, three yellow cards, and a complete lack of shame. It was a beautiful, ugly, and utterly absurd afternoon of sports. If you enjoy watching a team get outplayed for 90 minutes only to win by sheer stubbornness, then Poulpe is definitely the team for you. Absolute scenes! 🤡

Match details

On 13/09/2026 07:30

Stade Poulpe (Poulpe)

4799 spectators

No extra time

Robin Risser
254 pts
24 yrs
Boue
221 pts
24 yrs
Bounty dé...
212 pts
23 yrs
Leo Mercier
125 pts
26 yrs
Billy BRE...
271 pts
24 yrs
Petit Tocard
270 pts
24 yrs
Thibault ...
139 pts
28 yrs
Tonio Cas...
280 pts
23 yrs
Gros Tocard
271 pts
20 yrs
BIG FUSIL...
244 pts
23 yrs
Ambidextre
245 pts
23 yrs
Qecu
301 pts
23 yrs
Xaso
237 pts
19 yrs
Pexo
236 pts
21 yrs
Gisu
234 pts
21 yrs
Tequila
217 pts
31 yrs
Suly
236 pts
19 yrs
Josu
237 pts
22 yrs
Quju
236 pts
19 yrs
Juwi
249 pts
18 yrs
Vivi
247 pts
19 yrs
Fode
239 pts
18 yrs

Match commentary

  1. 90'

    Full time!

    Poulpe fans can be proud, as their players gave everything to beat a valiant AS Riotord side.

  2. 88'

    Yellow card for Bounty délicat

    The referee reaches for his pocket for this minor foul and it's the red... no, the referee made a mistake pulling that card, he apologizes, it's just a yellow!

  3. 88'

    Bounty délicat manages to dribble past Vivi, who catches up. Bounty délicat slaps his opponent! Foul!

  4. 86'

    Goal for AS Riotord! Suly

    Oh, what a blunder!!! Billy BRENNAN plays a weak backpass to his keeper, Suly intercepts, rounds the keeper, and scores into an empty net...

  5. 82'

    AS Riotord is calmly playing it around at the back, which is clearly frustrating the Poulpe players.

  6. 80'

    Free kick by Vivi

    Free kick taken by Vivi who curls a beautiful effort towards the top corner, but the keeper makes a spectacular save.

  7. 80'

    Yellow card for Gros Tocard

    Gros Tocard gets a yellow card; he needs to be careful now, the referee is watching him closely.

  8. 80'

    What a foul! As Suly was heading for goal, Gros Tocard comes in late and sweeps his opponent's legs!

  9. 77'

    Shot on target by Josu

    Fode dinks the ball over the defense, Josu hits a powerful half-volley straight into the arms of the well-positioned keeper!

  10. 74'

    BIG FUSIL A PROUT goes down in the box, but the referee tells him to get up. Fode wins the ball and starts a counter-attack.

  11. 69'

    Lovely ball from Fode for Josu, but a defender intercepts.

  12. 65'

    Shot off target by Josu

    Josu works the right flank before crossing. Suly tries to volley it home but miscues completely. Goal kick.

  13. 64'

    Free kick by Vivi

    Free kick taken by Vivi... The wall is too close and deflects the ball for a corner.

  14. 64'

    BIG FUSIL A PROUT just tackled Tequila with both feet off the ground! That deserves a card!

  15. 60'

    Shot off target by Billy BRENNAN

    A real masterclass from Billy BRENNAN, who dances past the defense with a lovely sombrero. He manages to cross, but Tonio Castagno, despite being alone in front of goal, inexplicably misses his header and sends the ball wide!

  16. 57'

    Shot off target by Tonio Castagno

    Tonio Castagno fires a low cross across the goal... Petit Tocard gets a touch but it goes out for a goal kick.

  17. 51'

    Shot on target by Josu

    Magnificent 30-meter strike from Josu. The keeper gathers the ball at the second attempt.

  18. 48'

    Poulpe is passing the ball around, with AS Riotord trying to win it back.

  19. 45'

    Back under way!

    Et c'est reparti pour une seconde période. L'équipe AS Riotord va devoir batailler si elle veut s'imposer.

  20. 45'

    Half-time

    C'est la fin de cette première mi-temps. Les équipes rentrent aux vestiaires pour 15 minutes sur le score de 3 buts à 1 pour Poulpe.

  21. 40'

    Gisu cuts through the defense on the right and fires in a low cross, which Leo Mercier manages to scramble away for a corner.

  22. 34'

    Free kick by Vivi

    Vivi strikes this free kick beautifully but it hits the crossbar. Robin Risser didn't even react.

  23. 34'

    Yellow card for Thibault Joly

    Yellow card for Thibault Joly! You have to wonder how he escaped a red for that nasty challenge...

  24. 34'

    Thibault Joly commits a deliberate obstruction on Suly. Watch out!

  25. 30'

    Ball recovered by Pexo who rushes to play Xaso through, but the pass is overhit and goes out of play.

  26. 28'

    Tonio Castagno attempts a tough tackle on Quju but only catches his opponent's legs... Watch out!

  27. 25'

    Goal for Poulpe! Ambidextre

    A powerful strike from Ambidextre that is unfortunately deflected by Pexo, beating his own keeper.

  28. 21'

    Goal for Poulpe! Thibault Joly

    After a long passing sequence, Petit Tocard lays it off for Thibault Joly, who beats the keeper with a powerful strike! Well played!

  29. 19'

    Poulpe is moving the ball well with crisp passing, forcing AS Riotord to chase. A great collective display from Poulpe!

  30. 15'

    Superb nutmeg by Tequila on his opponent Gros Tocard; he justifies his status as a key player for his team.

  31. 12'

    Shot off target by Josu

    A real masterclass from Josu, who dances past the defense with a lovely sombrero. He manages to cross, but Suly, despite being alone in front of goal, inexplicably misses his header and sends the ball wide!

  32. 9'

    Penalty converted by Petit Tocard

    And GOOOAL! Perfectly executed penalty sending Qecu the wrong way.

  33. 9'

    Penalty to Poulpe

    Undeniable foul in the box!... Petit Tocard steps up, places the ball on the spot, and takes a few steps back...

  34. 9'

    Yellow card for Qecu

    Qecu is lucky to get away with just a yellow card.

  35. 9'

    Qecu slides into Ambidextre as he sprints with the ball; that is a foul.

  36. 6'

    For the last few minutes, Poulpe and AS Riotord have just been watching each other play.

  37. 1'

    Goal for AS Riotord! Juwi

    Juwi lobs Robin Risser who was off his line, and the ball ends up in the back of the net!

  38. 0'

    Kick-off

    The referee kicks things off under torrential rain.

Key stats

Poulpe AS Riotord
34% Possession 66%
3 Goals 2
3 Shots on target 6
2 Shots off target 3
5 Fouls 1
3 Yellow cards 1
0 Red cards 0
0 Injuries 0

Scorers

  • Ambidextre 25'
  • Thibault Joly 21' Petit Tocard
  • Petit Tocard 9'

Scorers

  • Suly 86'
  • Juwi 1'

Goalkeeper

Defence

  • 88'

Midfield

  • 9'(Pen)21'
  • 21'34'
  • 80'

Attack

  • 25'

Substitutes

Goalkeeper

  • 9'

Defence

Midfield

  • 86'

Attack

  • 1'

Substitutes

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