It was less of a football match and more of a public execution as Liverpool dismantled US Rijsel in a ruthless 5-0 masterclass. The tone was set as early as the 4th minute when a clinical free-kick opened the floodgates, signaling a long, painful afternoon for the visitors. While Liverpool danced around the pitch with 11 shots on target, US Rijsel spent the majority of the game chasing shadows and committing fouls, seemingly under the impression that they were playing a rugby match instead of a professional football fixture. ⚽

By the 40th minute, the misery for US Rijsel was compounded when a sloppy foul gifted Liverpool a penalty, which was coolly converted to make it 3-0 before halftime. The visitors managed a solitary, pathetic shot off-target, effectively spending 90 minutes as mere spectators to their own funeral. Liverpool, on the other hand, played with the kind of arrogant ease that suggests they could have scored ten if they hadn't spent so much time practicing their target practice against the woodwork.

The final score of 5-0 is almost generous given the complete lack of resistance from US Rijsel, who finished the game with five fouls and zero shots on target to their name. Liverpool cruised through the second half, adding two more goals in the 61st and 84th minutes to put the finishing touches on a comprehensive beatdown. As the final whistle blew, the US Rijsel players looked like they wanted to vanish into the turf, while the Liverpool faithful celebrated a win that was as predictable as it was glorious. 💀