It was not so much a football match as it was a public execution. The Standard RSCL players seemingly decided that touching the ball was strictly against their religious beliefs, finishing the game with a grand total of zero shots—not even a wayward attempt to keep the keeper awake. By the 26th minute, the home side had already opted for the "if you can't beat them, kick them" strategy, earning a well-deserved red card that essentially turned the rest of the evening into a glorified Liverpool FC light training session. 🤡

Liverpool FC, meanwhile, treated the pitch like their own personal playground, racking up 11 shots on target and a 0-6 scoreline that flattered the hosts. After a shaky start with a missed free kick in the 7th minute, the Reds decided to stop playing with their food. The goals flowed with the inevitability of a rainy day in Merseyside, punctuated by a 51st-minute penalty that perfectly encapsulated the Standard RSCL defensive chaos. Watching the visitors pass the ball around was like watching a group of surgeons operating on a patient who had already checked out of the building.

By the time the final whistle mercifully blew, the Standard RSCL squad looked like they were ready to retire from professional sports and take up competitive knitting instead. With a pathetic tally of five fouls and zero offensive threat, they provided the perfect backdrop for a Liverpool FC masterclass that lacked even a single foul from the visitors. It was a brutal, one-sided affair that reminded us all why we love this beautiful, cruel game. Rest in peace, Standard RSCL dignity; you will not be missed. ⚽🔥